Fear Not, Introverts

Comfortable in a crowd, their very oxygen coming from contact with others, most extroverts enjoy public speaking a whole lot more than their introverted peers. At least that’s been my impression from 15 years of media training and speech coaching. But are they necessarily better at it? Not always.

I’ve seen supremely self-confident men and women swagger up to a podium full of bravado but lacking in preparation, only to completely bomb. They try to wing it, and find they’ve run out of material in 30 seconds. I’ve also seen shy people take the time to prepare and practice, and then deliver moving, funny, impactful messages in a way that influences audiences and advances their own agendas.

An introvert herself, Susan Cain, author of "Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking," offers excellent strategies for introverts in the extrovert-friendly cultures of Harvard Business School and Wall Street. And the #1 tip she offers in her section titled “Public Speaking for Introverts” at the back of the book is: Preparation is key.

And she's right. Yes, there are some exceptional people who can speak beautifully on a moment's notice and without notes for 15 minutes.  But for most of us that leads to certain disaster. So to all you introverts who’d rather walk barefoot on broken glass than stand and speak in front of a room full of people, consider these tips:

1. Take the time to prepare.  As far in advance of your presentation as possible, write out the storyline. Give it a powerful opening. Tell the audience why they should care. Back up your main points with interesting storytelling and elegantly simple visuals, avoiding "death by PowerPoint." Ask your audience for their support. End on a memorable closing note.  And then:

2. Practice out loud. Repeatedly. Some people fear speaking in public so much that they can't even bear to practice; they think "I'll just go up there and if I don't hyperventilate and pass out, at least I'll get through it." Bad idea. Yes, I can hear you saying it’s impossible to find time in your crazy schedule to do this, but simple out-loud practice is the best way to  overcome your shyness. Go into a room and shut the door. Stand and deliver the presentation with passion. If you do this several times, the information will become second nature to you, and you won’t suffer the anxiety that comes with not being quite sure where you’re headed.

 3. Breathe. I make a habit of performing the following breathing exercise just before I deliver a presentation: Inhale to a count of five. Exhale to a count of 10. Do 15 reps of this and it will have a calming effect.

 4. Visualize.  Do as pro athletes do. Play a little movie in your brain of yourself succeeding at the task you’re about to perform. If you’re at the foul line in the NBA finals, you would envision the ball going nothing-but-net before you take the shot. If you’re about to be introduced before your speech at a conference, close your eyes for a moment and imagine yourself striding onto the stage with confidence and delivering a performance that makes you and your agenda look good. In a sense, you’ve “already been there” once you do this, and thus the fear of the unknown is minimized.

5. They like you. They really like you. Remember that, in most situations, the audience wants you to succeed. It’s boring and awkward to watch someone dying up there on the stage, so draw strength from the knowledge that the audience is genuinely hoping that you’ll entertain and inform. And if you happen to spot audience members who are yawning, rolling their eyes, or texting, to heck with ‘em. Make eye contact with someone who’s smiling or nodding her head in agreement. Instant confidence booster.

And by the way, these tips work for extroverts as well. You may not lack for self-confidence, but you'll always deliver a much better presentation if you do some homework beforehand.

Daniel Day-Lewis: He Can Act, and He Can Give a Speech Too

Last night's Oscar acceptance speeches were the usual mixed bag of good, bad and atrocious, but one presenter really stood out as a role model for all of us in business and government: Daniel Day-Lewis. Not only is DD-L the only actor in history to take home the Best Actor Oscar three times - he also knows how to give a succinct, funny, gracious speech. Oratorio's Bill Connor was interviewed for this by Fox Business News today - see the link here.

Staying On Message with the Dowager Duchess of Downton Abbey

Ever the master communicator, Maggie Smith's Lady Violet Crawley understands the importance of staying on message. Remember how she strong-armed poor Dr. Clarkson to stick to the story that Sybil had only the tiniest chance of survivial after preclampsia set in? She did this because Sybil's mother Lady Grantham still thought Sybil might have survived if she had been taken to the hospital for a C-section, which Lord Grantham had opposed on another doctor's recommendation.

Lady Violet tells Dr. Clarkson: "You've created a division between my son and his wife when the only way they can conceivably bear their grief is if they face it together." In other words, don't let your words foment any doubt in Lady Grantham's mind.

In a subsequent scene, Lord and Lady Grantham question Dr. Clarkson at length but he doesn't stray from the main theme: that Sybil would have most likely died even if she had delivered the baby by Cesarean as he had recommended.

From Episode 5:

Dr. Clarkson:

On that awful night I'm afraid I'm afraid I may have given you the impression my recommended course of treatment offered a real chance of Lady Sybil's survival. The truth, and I've done a great deal of research since as you can imagine, is that the chance was a small one, a tiny one really. 

Lady Grantham:

But ... there was a chance.

(Long look between Dr. Clarkson and Lady Violet.)

Dr. Clarkson:

An infinitesimal one. The discomfort and the terror would have been all too certain.

Lord Grantham:

So you think Tapsell (the other doctor) was right?

Dr. Clarkson:

Oh, I cannot go that far. Sir Tapsell ignored all the evidence in an unhelpful, and if I may say, an arrogant manner.

Lord Grantham:

But ... Sybil was going to die.

Dr. Clarkson:

When everything is weighted in the balance, I believe Lady Sybil was going to die.

So: Dr. Clarkson maintains his proper English stiff upper lip and stays on message, and Lord and Lady Grantham go back to sleeping in the same bed again. It worked in a 1920's Yorkshire estate, and it still works everywhere else in 2013.

Carnival CEO Buries The Lead

Before boarding the Carnival Triumph to face his disgusted, frightened and spitting-mad customers last night, Carnival CEO Gerry Cahill delivered a three-minute statement to the assembled news media.

And while he eventually said some of the right things, it took him a minute and 46 seconds to say what he should have said right at the start. He should have apologized to his customers right from the get-go.

Cahill started by talking about the "tremendous effort" that went into getting the ship back to shore. He thanked the U.S. Coast Guard, U.S. Customs and Border Protection, U.S. Public Health Service, the City of Mobile and the Port of Mobile. He thanked Carnival employees on land and onboard. He said how nice it was that the guests had recognized the efforts of the crew in online posts and in news media interviews.

That's all fine - it's very important to thank employees and partners in a crisis situation - but it wasn't until the 1:46 point that he finally said: "I'd like to reiterate the apology I made earlier. I know the conditions onboard were very poor. I know it was very difficult. And I want to apologize again for subjecting our guests to that."

I'm speculating here, but I get the impression that Cahill thought he had already apologized to his customers over the long days before the ship finally made it to Mobile, and that's why he didn't start with an apology this time. But this was his most important news media appearance up to that point, and delaying the apology by first talking about Carnival employees made him come off as a bit self-serving.

His on-camera performance wasn't terrific, either. He spent most of his time with his eyes cast downward, which made him look a little unsure of himself. Better to keep the chin up and make eye contact with the reporters on hand.

Listen, the guy was in a very tough spot. It's hard to say you're sorry. It's particularly hard for a proud CEO to say he's sorry. It's particularly hard for a proud CEO to say he's sorry over and over again. But rule number one of crisis communications is to express concern for your customers first.

Bill Connor of Oratorio Media and Presentation Training Quoted in The Washington Post

Oratorio's Bill Connor was asked to comment for Sari Horwitz and Peter Finn's story on the NRA's media messaging strategy in the February 14, 2013 Washington Post - see the full article here.